Finding out you’re going to become a grandparent is pretty exciting and I’m used to people saying that being a grandma is “the best”, but I don’t think I’ve ever really heard people say what actually happens when you become a grandma. Or maybe I just haven’t listened closely enough! For me, becoming a grandma has been overwhelming. Overwhelming in a good way, that is!
There are two main things that “happened” to me when I became a grandma.
The first thing was that my mommy instincts kicked right back in. Holding, feeding, burping, diapering…all of the essential baby care tasks came back in an instant. I was so surprised. My youngest child is almost twenty so I thought for sure that I would be out of practice. But I guess it’s like riding a bike; once you’ve learned, you never forget how. The same goes for caring for a baby, apparently!
The other thing that happened when I became a grandma was that my heart grew bigger. I have three children and with each one my capacity to love increased. It’s a natural occurrence, I’m sure, instinctual, perhaps. But the birth of our newest little grandson has made me feel a bit like the Grinch when he has his epiphany about Christmas and experiences a change of heart toward everyone in Whoville. The story says that his heart grew three sizes and that he had the strength of “ten grinches plus two”. This is exactly how I feel! The birth of this little has filled me to the point of bursting! I feel a bit giddy and have noticed an increase of energy and a lightness of heart.
I think that one of the reasons that becoming a grandma is so amazing is that while we are raising our children, we forget. We forget the initial flood of love and emotion that occurs when they are born because raising children is hard work. While they are growing up we are dealing with their emotions, hormones, attitudes and everything else that goes with it and the “new parent euphoria” wears off. When you become a grandma, the euphoria comes back. And I have a feeling that it lasts longer for grandparents than it does for parents.
Perhaps it’s because, generally, grandparents aren’t responsible for raising them. We influence our grandchildren, for sure, but the pressures of parenthood aren’t heavy upon us. We are free(er) to simply enjoy (and spoil) them!
The other evening, as I was holding LittleMan, Girl2 teased about how I’ve been since his birth. Well, I can’t help it! When she has children, she’ll understand. And when she has grandchildren, she’ll marvel at her heart just as I marvel at mine now.
Becoming a grandma has been one of the best experiences of my life and I hope that as the grandchildren grow I will remember to enjoy every moment with them and to be a constant source of support for their parents. Like I said, raising children is hard work. But as a grandma, I am older so I have a reserve of information, wisdom, and patience!
We are blessed by our children and doubly blessed by our grandchildren. That is the truth of it. It’s what happens when you become a grandma; the blessings abound! The anticipation of LittleMan’s birth was nerve-wracking but his arrival has been overwhelmingly amazing!
We’re excited to watch the grandchildren grow and as they do, this Nonnie will continue to share about the amazing adventures of becoming a grandma!
It’s amazing how the everyday tasks of house and home can help to provide words of wisdom for me to share with young parents!
One day several years ago I was feeling particularly self-satisfied with my accomplishments around the house. I had cleaned it from top to bottom and it felt great.
Just a couple of months before that, I remember looking around my house in disgust and asking my teenagers, “Do you remember when I used to keep the house so clean we could have eaten off the floors if we wanted to?”
The three looked at me, a bit puzzled and replied, “We don’t remember how clean the house was, but we remember how crazy, scary you got while doing it!”
I was horrified by their response, but they were right! I did get crazy, scary when I would clean. And not because I dislike housework. In fact, I like cleaning! I think it was more because I would get frustrated that the house wasn’t always clean because you just never know when one of those home decor magazines is going to show up at your door and want to take pictures! Just kidding. Sort of.
But my kids’ honesty humbled me and as I pondered their words, I realized my error.
A long time ago, I had fallen into a trap. A trap that said I had to be Suzie Homemaker, Betty Crocker, Joan of Arc, and Mother Teresa all in one.
It was a train of thought that said that in order for me to truly be a good wife and mom, I had to perform a certain way. It was exhausting. And unfortunately, I remained in that trap for several years.
You see, my children didn’t care how clean or dirty my house was. They cared more about how it affected me. They noticed more whether I spent time with them or on housework. They shared with me how they felt as if I cared more about how clean the house was than I did about them! The very thought of it brings tears to my eyes!
Through life and circumstances, I was freed from that way of thinking and began to relax a little bit more. I learned to choose my battles more wisely and how to make the best use of my time. And I gave up the idea that anyone was going to show up for a photo shoot of my house.
But by this time, my children were teenagers and didn’t necessarily want to always spend time with me, but when they did, I absolutely jumped at the chance!
The years go by too quickly and I now see that I wasted some of the best years on things that don’t matter as much as I used to think they did.
Parenting isn’t easy and thankfully, the children don’t hold it against me. Most of the time they laugh about it and make jokes about how “crazy” I was. Thank goodness that I’m better now – mostly. Ha!
As for Mr. SBF, he has never said anything about the cleanliness (or dirtiness of the house) – ever.
He’s always thought of me as Suzie Homemaker, Betty Crocker, Joan of Arc and Mother Teresa all rolled into one. And I suspect that it shall remain so for the rest of our days.
So, when all is said and done, what matters the most in life is spending quantity, as well as quality, time with your loved ones. Don’t pass up those opportunities for making great memories. The days go by quickly and before you know it, your children will be having children!
Don’t get side-tracked by the mundane things in life. Instead, cultivate a life of purposeful interactions and by the time your grandchildren are born, you’ll be a pro at having fun and making great memories!
Right now, we’re awaiting the birth of our grandson. His due date is the 18th and we’re on pins and needles, just wishing and waiting for the call from his daddy, announcing his arrival. What day will it be?
Check back soon or follow us on our social media pages to find out! Until then have fun making great memories with your babies!
This year has been quite different for us. Mr. SBF and I were able to take an extended sabbatical and spent the last six months of the year road tripping, camping and visiting with family. The break from the stress of the past decade and from our normal routine was definitely needed and we feel so very blessed to have been given the opportunity.
One thing that I became aware of early on in our break was the fact that I am often not “present” in my everyday life. As an Empath, I am almost constantly inundated with the feelings and emotions of others and I think that retreating into my own thoughts is one of the ways I am able to combat the exhaustion that comes from the constant influx of emotion that I am faced with on a daily basis. And because I am often in my own head, I have realized that I miss out on a lot.
Sometimes when the family is reminiscing about something or even during a conversation with someone I’ll suddenly “snap out of it” and realize that I missed out on part of it because I wasn’t “all there”. Yes, really. Ugh.
And don’t get me started on electronic devices and what a huge distraction they can be! Giving a device to people who are in the habit of retreating into their own thoughts only perpetuates the problem, er, issue! And forget about giving them earbuds. I mean…yeah…just don’t! Can any Introverts relate or is it just me? Haha!
Anyway, during our time together, since it was just the two of us and we were traveling in our own car, I was able to sit and enjoy the scenery (and my electronic device) without the “noise” from the outside world. So, when we were around other people, I was able to listen and enjoy it because, during our travel time, I was able to rest and “regroup”.
Becoming more self-aware has been something I’ve been working on for several years now. And I’m grateful that I became aware of this “issue” early on in our sabbatical. I believe that it helped me to focus on making sure the time with my Sweetheart was quality time. And it has definitely made me more mindful of the time I spend with loved ones. I don’t want to miss out on any of the good stuff when my children and grandchildren are home because times well spent make the most treasured memories!
To make sure I’m paying attention to life, follow my social media pages! Let me know if you notice a lack of presence there! Heehee.
When I was a young mom I remember people telling me to enjoy the time with my children while they were little because time goes by so quickly. I would smile and nod while wondering to myself if I would survive the toddler years.
Now that my children are grown I realize that I was given wise advice. The child-rearing season goes by extremely fast and before you know it, they are grown and having children of their own. That’s the season we’re in now. “Grandparent Season”!
How can it be that my sweet little round-headed boy, my “Baby Pumpkin”, “ManBoy” is going to be a daddy? Wasn’t it just yesterday that he was enjoying his first Christmas? And then the next day, his first birthday? Weren’t we just struggling with toddler tantrums and experiencing his strong will for the first time? Not very long ago we were dealing with raging hormones and temper flares that challenged us to our core.
Yet, here we are. ManBoy is all grown up and he and his beautiful “Watermelon” are starting a family of their own!
In a month, grandson number three is due to make his entrance into the world, to fill our hearts and our home with insurmountable joy. We are looking forward to this little and can’t wait to spoil him “rotten”!
For us, this winter means, “Baby is Coming!”
Check back with us soon for updates about our little’s arrival!
Our twin grandsons turned three this past weekend. How did this happen so quickly? It seems like just yesterday that we were traveling to Southern California for their Mommy and Dada’s baby shower! The fact that they’re now (very) active three-year-olds almost seems crazy!
For their party, our daughter-in-love purchased mini donkey pinatas and colorful maracas which paired perfectly with the darling terracotta pot sombreros that my crafting goddess sister-in-love made. Dang, Auntie SagebrushFarm is clever!
The Fiesta theme was perfect! The boys love a party (especially a party with chips!) and it was a great way to introduce them to our Hispanic heritage.
There was a bounce house, and for the children, it was the star of the party.
But for us, the Taco Truck and Nacho Bar hit the spot!
A good time was had by all and I am so thankful that we have been blessed to have been able to make the trip to California to celebrate the twins birthday every year thus far.
Time flies when you’re getting older and we have learned to treasure every moment with our littles. It wasn’t so very long ago that our own children were toddlers running around the house, ready to Fiesta!
For more fun with the children, follow us on our social media pages!